The Little Things

My picture definitely does not help my argument. More of an in the moment type thing.

      Throughout the vast existence that we like to call life, there are some things that are as constant as the sun rising every day that some people have an eye for. I usually tend to refer to these things as “what its all about”. These things are the smallest moments where everything can just be forgotten for a short amount of time. Here’s an example: Monday night, I was finishing up my third class of the day and my first real day of college. I was tired and was kind of in an indifferent mood. Things were just ehh. I left my class around 8:45 and stepped outside into the absolute perfect weather. It was the definition of a perfect summer night. 70 degrees with a slight wind. I stopped for a second to get my headphones out and took a look around at all of the buildings that crowd the sky in Oakland. I put my headphones in and instantly put on my addiction, The Story So Far, (It just puts me in the best state of mind.) and made the walk back to my dorm in the cool summer air. Another example took place about three weeks. I had just finished an early morning practice at Schenley Park. I was slightly overwhelmed and still in that in between state of mind as I was making the transition to the college lifestyle. It was another really perfect day. I took a walk over a spot under a tree to sit the wake of one of the best views of the city (Besides Mt. Washington of course). Moments like that remind things like that, the little things, are what its all about. 

Alone.

      Seeing the title may make you think that this will be a depressing post. When I say “alone”, I mean in the sense that I am musically alone. I may be the only person in my dorm that listens to the type of music that I do. You may think, oh that’s no big deal, just get some headphones. Its actually a really tough thing to deal with. I need my daily fill of The Story So Far and A Day to Remember. I always prefer to belt the lyrics out at the top of my lungs as well. I always end up coming back to depth when I talk about music. Of course, I can’t not like people for not listening to more similar music that I listen to. Although, some music is just awful lyrically and melodically. It must take a very small brain to be able to enjoy some of this stuff, or they just aren’t listening very hard. My music sounds good and has a relatable meaning (most of the time) that really makes me feel like I’m connected to the song. 

      I like to relax, chill. I cannot constantly be surrounded by loud obnoxious music and people acting like complete goons. My idea of a good ass night (Bro Code) would be just relaxing anywhere I can put my feet up with some good music and in the case that the planets align, a great girl. But, that’s a long shot. I mean sure, eventually things will come along, but I’m one of those guys who’s a girlfriend guy. It’s what I kind of always wanted. It’s cool to have someone that always has your back and you can do anything with. Of course, your family and friends have your back. But, I’m not sure how to describe it, it’s different. There are very few things that I have trouble putting into words, and that topic is one of them.

Four Years.

      Tonight was my first night back at home since i moved into my dorm last monday. So, it’s been a week. You would think that I’m homesick or something. Living 20 minutes away from college definitely has its perks. I went home to get more clothes and to visit since I have that ability unlike a lot of other people here at college. While I was at home, my sister who is entering junior high, needed picked up at my old high school from soccer practice. I offered to go and get her because the one thing I really miss is my car. What I miss more than just my car is blasting music and singing my lungs out in my car. So, on my way to pick up my sister, I made sure I got my fill of loud music. 

      As the fall gets closer, I am always reminded of the old high school days. I was thinking of going to football games on friday nights and getting ready for soccer games on tuesdays and thursdays. I will definitely miss high school without a doubt. It’s not even so much high school in the sense of school that I will miss. Its everything that came with the experience. The four years of life that were filled with so many different things. All of my friends have gone their separate ways and how can we know if we’ll ever be in that same place again? You learn so much about yourself and other people during those four years. 

       It’s so bitter sweet the way your mind glorifies past experiences. Those things that at the time you think won’t ever matter to you. Then your mind goes and reminds you of it and it seems like it was the best thing ever. 

Better Days.

     As my third day of dorm life is coming to a close, my spirits have been lifted heavily. The past two days, I was the so overwhelmed with absolutely everything. To make things worse, this morning I, along with 6 other freshman, had to sit out of the first training session of preseason because of the lack of clearance from our sickle cell tests. It was not the way I imagined my first day of preseason at the college level. Later, we came back for the second session and we weren’t cleared to play then either. After around 20 minutes into the session, we received a call that we were all cleared to play. Finally. After a few rounds of an agility course, i was pulled out early along with the two other goalkeepers to go do goalkeeper specific training. My specialty. I shined pretty brightly on my first day. 

       Ending the second session is always the best feeling. We came back to the dorm and just chilled for about 2 hours until dinner. i was absolutely starving. We all went to dinner and I ate an ass load of food. After dinner I decided to take a walk down campus to pick up some food for the dorm. On my way down, I took a look around and really took everything in. Being in the city, the awesome weather (for today at least), and the soccer was all it was really about. That’s why I’m here. 

        I got back to the dorm and hung out for a bit and then we ended up meeting all of the freshman soccer girls on our floor. Thank god I don’t have to constantly be surrounded by sweaty ball sack anymore. It’s a great feeling. They are all super cool I can tell that this year is going to be sick.

My Passion is Becoming More Clear Every Day.

     Ever since the idea of college became real, I’ve noticed how important music is to me. Of course, I’ve always known it was something I loved a lot but lately I’ve realized it on another level. I started comparing the two things that I’ve always loved which are music and soccer. I came to the conclusion that if for whatever reason soccer was eliminated, I could live as long as music is still there. Although, vice versa, I could not survive.

       For a while, I thought that my dream was to play for a big club in England in the Premier League. As it turns out, that isn’t my dream at all. My dream is to be the frontman for a punk band. I knew this after I went to my first A Day to Remember concert. Being on stage screaming the lyrics to songs that have every ounce of your heart and soul in them is something amazing. Being in the crowd is an experience like no other. There is no better feeling than going to a concert and completely getting lost in the music. It can feed your soul. 

      My appearance would definitely change if I were in a band too. I always tried to refrain from tattoos and such because I wanted to maintain the professional look for whatever job I would end up later in life. If circumstances were different, I would definitely have a few sweet ass tattoos by now. 

      Anyway, I’ve come to realize that music, well more importantly, the music scene that I listen to, will definitely play a huge role in my career choice. Now I just have to figure out how that fits into a college major…

First Layer

      Have you ever felt surrounded by people that are one dimensional? By that, I mean people that don’t have any depth. I have always been a deep person. I’m always looking for the deeper meaning of things. I think a lot too. Today is my first day of actual dorm life. I moved in around 12 o’ clock today. I’m here about a week earlier than everyone else because of preseason starting tomorrow. The only people in my dorm right now that i’ve been hanging around are my suite mates and some of the other freshman guys on the team. They just seem so, is the word superficial? I don’t know why I get that vibe. Granted, it is early. I’ve been living with these guys for about 8 hours now. 

      During my 18 years of life, I’ve come to realize that I need other people. And those people need to have depth. There have been tweets being recycled lately about people not being okay with just the common “hey what’s up” conversations. They go on to talk about how the tweeters want real conversations. They want to know what goes on in your head, what your favorite song is, and your outlook on life. This is the kind of thing I want, but I want that with everyone that I meet. Of course there are those special people that you want to know every last detail about. But, it couldn’t hurt to have those conversations a little more often than the norm. 

      

Pre College, Post High School.

      With a day a half before I move into my dorm, I just keep thinking about the big change that is coming and some of the change that has all ready set in. I will be moving in a few days earlier than every other freshman at my school because I am playing for the soccer team. And since I’m the only one of the three of my best friends playing sports in college, I’ll be the first one to leave. It’s such a hard concept to think about. While I was in high school, I always thought to myself, “I’ll be fine going to college and making new friends.” In reality, it’s pretty discomforting thinking about leaving all of the people I’ve known my entire life. What if we aren’t friends later in life? What if things change drastically? This transition is something everyone has to deal with at some point or another. 

      It sucks to think that all of my friends from high school will never be at the same place at one time again, unless we make that happen. Everyone is going to go and meet tons of new people. All of the experiences of high school just turn into memories. 

      When I think about the down sides of things, it can be hard to see the better parts. Although, I am pretty excited to be living the dorm life and to go and meet a bunch of new people. Its a big change, but one that must be made. 

Intro

I’ve always been told that I have a knack for writing. Whether or not that is true, sometimes I just need to get my thoughts out. As it turns out, I have a lot of them. After a lot of journal writing for the past year, I figured I’d turn to blogging just to see if anyone can see where I’m coming from every now and then. I could range from music to movies to experiences to the hopeless romantic thoughts that I always seem to go back to. I thought it would be easier to type these things out rather than write them. (Also, because my handwriting is shit.)